3-22-20 Day 9

Oh, nevermind, we don’t have green onions, they’re in quarantine.

Elisabeth and I are really trying to take this virus seriously. Let me rephrase that, Elisabeth is taking this virus seriously and I am trying to. She’s doing a better job than me. While I transitioned to working from home easily and readily, the disinfecting of everything and the wearing face protection in public has been more of a struggle for me. Do I really have to wash my hands every time I step outside my apartment? Yes. Do we really have to disinfect the canned beans and the bag of bread? Yes. Should I really cover my face with a scarf when grocery shopping just in case I’m infected so I don’t infect others? Yes.

It’s tough and I complain a lot and Elisabeth has been fantastically patient with me, bless her. I think part of my struggle comes from me pushing away the fear. If I don’t disinfect then it means this isn’t as real as it actually is. But through therapy I’ve learned that being vulnerable and embracing your emotions is both mentally healthy and leads to one being happier. So, this virus scares me sometimes. I go to bed and then wake up and this virus is still a thing. It’s not a bad dream and there is no definitive end to it.

We listened to our governor’s speech this afternoon and his words helped me feel a bit better. He acknowledged that we can’t live like this for a long time, we can’t live like this for a year and he’s dedicated to coming up with a solution so we don’t have to. I felt like my unspoken fears had been heard. It felt a little good.

There is so much talk about the virus that it becomes overwhelming. Maybe I overloaded myself today. It’s important to stay up to date but to do it in a manageable way, to turn off the constant stream and breathe freely for a while. I think I might implement a “no corona virus discussion past 6pm” rule for myself, or something similar.

I went on a walk today around the neighborhood and was way more successful at avoiding people than I was at the park. I listened to music as I strolled and even got in a few dance moves. I had a comic book meetup via Google hangouts which not only provided a really interesting discussion but also allowed me to feel connected to my friends. I took some adorable pictures of Pippin and enjoyed the knowledge that staying home means he is happier because I’m here and means I’ll get to take loads more pictures of him.

Elisabeth and I made tostadas for dinner and when I was listing off the items we could put on our tostadas I mentioned the green onions we had bought yesterday at H Mart, our Asian store. A couple minutes later, I realized they actually weren’t an option, because we are letting them sit for three to four days just in case they have the virus on them. So I told Elisabeth, “oh nevermind, we don’t have green onions, they’re in quarantine”, and I said it so nonchalantly that Elisabeth cracked up. It was exactly what we needed to release the tension we had accumulated after the governor’s speech. These weird times at least lead to interesting conversations and loads of cat pictures.

For tonight’s happy moment, I provide this video of some of the Colorado Symphony musicians playing a piece remotely. Humanity is pretty awesome sometimes.

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